Is the Grass Really Greener on the Other Side?

For the last five days I have been battling a nasty cold.  I've barely had any energy to do anything and have mostly been in bed sleeping or trying to sleep.  I've been alternating between my Ventolin puffer, water dis-solvable aspirin (so gross), and cough syrup.  I even lost my voice yesterday.  Today I'm finally feeling a little better.  I've spent a lot of time feeling sorry for myself over the last few days (as you do when you're ill) and have been thinking about the "what if's".  As in the "What if we stayed home and didn't go on this journey".  So I thought I'd blog about how we ended up here to get a few things out of my system.

In January 2010 Joel were on our yearly escape-the-winter-blues, beach getaway in Cuba.  It was a beautiful, sunny day and we were floating out in the big,blue ocean in a paddleboat, thinking how great life was at this moment.  That's when the Big Idea hatched.  Wouldn't it be nice to live like this all the time?  No snow, constant sunshine, and a piece of paradise.  Yes, it would!  Where could we live like this all year round?  The Caribbean is beautiful, but not a permanent home.  The US is too hard to get into (and has crappy health care).  What first world countries are there that speak English and have such great weather?  Ding, ding, ding- Australia!  Dewey had just recently got back from a six month school stint there and we were filled with all the wonderful things she had to say about living there.  Various other friends and family members had made the journey as well, with nothing but good stories to tell.  We also needed a big change.  2009 was a tough year for us, and I wanted a fresh start.  All our friends were slowly moving away and going on big adventures and we were feeling like there was no one left, so why were we still in Edmonton?  So it was decided, we should move to Australia.  Pretty sure at that moment we paddled back to shore and announced it to our new vacation best friends, who only encouraged us more as they had all spent time in Australia.  They were even the ones who suggested coming to live in Surfers Paradise!

When we got home the cold weather got us thinking about moving even more.  I wanted to go as soon as possible, but Joel needed to finish up his apprenticing and save up some money.  We decided that January 2012 seemed like a good time to go.  That would give us two years to get organized and save up some money.  We started researching things, looking into visas, the cost of living, and slowly telling family and friends.  Wow, we were actually going to do something cool!  2012 couldn't come faster for me.  In the meantime, life in Edmonton got better.  Our condo renovations were finally finished, Joel got his Journeyman Certificate, we made new friends and had made some awesome memories.  All the bad things that had been plaguing me the year before seemed to disappear.  2011 ended up being one of my best years!

When August came around it was time to walk the walk and really put this Aussie idea into motion if it was ever going to happen.  So by September we had listed our condo for sale and I let my boss know our big plans (which was actually real sad to do!).  Sometime around Halloween we got an offer- which meant this was really happening!  After the offer went through we applied and were accepted for one year working holiday visas, got ready to move and got our flights organized.  Before we knew it, the time had arrived and we were really going to make the big leap of faith! 

 The last month before we left was so much harder for me then I thought.  When I originally came up with this plan I envisioned how great it would be to say goodbye and get the heck out of Edmonton.  (As a teenager that had been my only long term dream).  But when it really happened, it was so sad.  Saying goodbye to close friends and family is not easy.  I started to feel really bad for leaving people, and for all the events I'd be missing in that years time.  There were a lot of tears shed!  But when we said goodbye to our families at the airport I somehow pulled it together and didn't cry, despite the tears from both our Moms. I was excited!  Joel and I had each other and were going on the biggest adventure of our lives together.  

Our first few days here were totally surreal, like it was just a dream.  We were busy getting organized and setting up our new life.  I have to keep remembering to be proud of ourselves- we've accomplished a lot in only two months!  We really started from scratch and had to figure things out on our own- no Dad to fall back on!  This has been a good thing for us.  Though there were a few moments when I really needed a time out from Joel, I know together we are so strong and can conquer the world.

Now we are still settling in.  Trying to find a new routine, comfortable hang outs, new friends.  Adapting to life on the other side of the world.  And I get so homesick for the comforts of life I'm used to.  Joel keeps reminding me that we came here because it was something I wanted to do.  I have to start living in the now, not the past.  I have so many happy memories of home that I can think of anytime I like, but for now life is here, in Australia, and I need to focus on that.  I will always love and miss my friends and my family, but I can't get hung up on all the times with them I'm missing or I will be missing out on things here.  I know they will all still be there for me when we come back and on the days I'm blue and really need them.  But I need everyone to support me being here, be happy for me, stop telling me to hurry home.  I feel flattered to be missed and loved so much, but it makes it that much harder for me to enjoy this experience.
  I do want to come back to Canada one day.  As much as I never thought I'd say this, I miss the seasons!  But Joel and I have been given a wonderful opportunity that not everyone gets, so I need to just roll with the punches and enjoy this chapter of life, so one day I can look back and think Wow, how awesome that we did that!  Maybe we'll stay here longer then a year, maybe we won't.  I'm not going to stress about it.  What's meant to be is meant to be.